Are You Ready to Get Married?

Marriage is a union you make with one person on a single day for life, so before you think of matrimony, it will be wise to ask yourself ‘Am I ready to get married?’.  First and foremost, it is essential to feel the lack of a soul mate. In case, you are single, you may take the help of online matrimonial sites to find an ideal partner whose preferences match yours.

Have you completed your education?

It is important to finish your education before you think of marriage. Remember that proper education can provide you with a good job and can give you financial security. Marriage comes with responsibilities towards your partner, so ensure you have done your best to give her a good future. In case of women, it will be better to complete your education and then get married, as all groom’s families will not be open to the idea of their daughter-in-law going to the college or university after marriage.

How financially secure are you?

This goes especially for the men. It is advisable to have a stable job before getting married. If you are having a stable income every month, you can relax and get married. Women who want to be financially independent should not think about marriage before finding a job and earning. It is better if you can save some amount in your bank account before you fix the date for your wedding. Nowadays, several brides and grooms prefer to pay for their own weddings; in this case, you will need to have some savings.

Are you ready to adjust and share?

You may have been the only child of your parents, but after marriage, you will have to adjust and share everything that is yours with your life partner. Note that the sharing part is not limited to material things, but you also have to be comfortable in sharing your views, secrets and dreams. Marriage brings in adjustment; so you must be willing to accept your life partner as your better half and forget about ‘me’ and only think about ‘us’.

Are you serious enough?

Marriage is not a cake walk; the honeymoon phase ends quickly and then there are several efforts required from both the husband and the wife in keeping their marriage intact. You need to be serious about each other and make a commitment to keep the bond strong and going forever.

Does your vision of future match hers/his?

In case you have found someone with whom you would like to spend a lifetime, find out if his/her vision of future matches yours. If the views do not match at all, there will be no gain in going ahead with the relationship.

 If you are confused in determining whether you are ready for marriage or not, you can also go for premarital counseling. This might act as the perfect guidance for you as well as your would-be life partner.

Learn to Look Beyond Looks

If you have decided to choose your life partner from many options, as in an arranged marriage, why not choose well? The foundation of a successful marriage depends on how well you make a choice. Whether it’s a first marriage or second wedding or mixed marriage, the key is to look beyond good looks and try to understand whether you will have a great future with that person and can shape your life well.

When you start looking for a life partner through an online matrimony site, through classifieds, or by reference from a friend, have an open mind and do not just focus on complexion, height, weight, good looks, etc. Remember that no human is perfect; you are not either, so why look for a perfect bride or groom? Rather find a human who will be your friend, spouse and partner for life.

Be natural and let others be natural

It is important for you not to behave in an artificial manner and also make the other person comfortable. Remember what you see in a lady/man in the first few meetings is what you may have to face all your life. So make the right decision and advance; if you do not like a behavior, you might let the person know that politely, but never expect a person to change his/her natural behavior.

Like or Unlike

When you talk to a prospective match for the first time, you will come to know whether you both share certain interests. If you like the person at the first meeting, consider it to be a green signal to be a go ahead. If you are seeking a life partner, the person should at least be suitable enough to be your friend at the first meeting.

See the future together

If you find that the prospective match does not see future like you do or do not have plans that coincide with yours. You can stop and take the red signal.

Getting Prepared for a Honeymoon

Honeymoon is a word that is attractive to all newly wedded couples. Deciding where to go and what to do seems very exciting to the new bride and groom. However, if you want nothing to go wrong in the first trip after marriage, and keep it enjoyable and memorable, you need to take care of certain factors.

Planning is essential

Do not compromise on the planning part. The better you plan, the better your trip is going to be. In case the man is making the arrangements, he should talk to his life partner and keep in mind her likes and dislikes. It is not a good thing to let the parents take part in the planning as it is yours and your life partner’s special trip, so let it be just the two of you in the picture.

Weather updates

 It is important to follow the weather forecasts and then take your pick. If it is a monsoon, then it is best to avoid hill stations and if it is summer, then you will do best to keep away from having a desert honeymoon. It is a good idea to research the internet for the type of weather at the place you have decided for the trip.

Make the reservations

It is better to book the train/bus/air tickets as early as possible. Also make reservations with a travel agency as well as make the reservations for the hotel or resort you are going to stay in. Check out the tour packages available and pick the best one that is affordable and a good option for both of you. You definitely do not want to run about making the reservations on your trip and lose out on quality together-time.

Set the budget

Fix the budget beforehand and try to adhere to it strictly. There are several expenses when you are starting a new life together, so do not make any extra expenditure on your trip. Be wise and spend wisely.

Medical supplies

If you or your partner needs some medicines, do not wait to get it in the honeymoon destination. It is better if you carry them with you; the medicines might not be available in the place you are going. It will be ideal if you can carry a first aid medical kit.

Travel documents

Make sure you are carrying your passport, ID proof and even your marriage certificate. You may never predict when you might need which document, so it is always better to be on the safe side.

Camera

Do not forget to take your camera on your honeymoon. You will surely want to capture some great moments of you two to look back and smile in the future.

Necessities

Think about what you need. If you are planning a camping, it is essential to carry a tent. In case you are going for a safari or planning a honeymoon to the jungles or forests, a mosquito repellant lotion is a must. You would not want to be down with malaria or dengue on your honeymoon.

A Low Budget Wedding Can Benefit You

It may be your dream to have a lavish wedding, but if you can control this urge and spend reasonably in your big day to have a smaller wedding, you can end up saving a lot of money for your new life together. Apart from the ‘save money’ factor, there are many other reasons to have a small wedding.

Inviting less people

In a small wedding you do not invite a lot of people, but only people who are closer to you and whom you want to be a part of your happiness. This allows the newly wedded couple to attend the guests personally and talk to them.

You are relaxed

If you are inviting less people and people who you are comfortable with, you will be very much relaxed on your wedding day. To top it all, you will not feel the need to put on an artificial smile on your face. You will enjoy everyone’s presence and enjoy your own wedding better.

Save money for your dream honeymoon

In case you save money in organizing a big fat Indian wedding, you can save a lot to go to a foreign destination, exotic or European location for your honeymoon later. It I not the wedding day that matters, it the life that follows after that matters a lot.

Planning a destination wedding

Having a low budget wedding will also enable you to plan for a destination wedding, which is quite in vogue today. You can save the money and plan for a beach wedding or a wedding in some hill station with only close friends and relatives as your guests.

Pre-wedding Photo Sessions are in Trend

More and more Indians are now open to the idea of having a pre-wedding photo shoot done. This is viewed as one brilliant way to capture the love moments before tying the knot and uniting for life. Not only people who are having a love marriage, even people settling for an arranged marriage are hiring photographers for a pre-wedding photo session.

In the case of arranged weddings, the bride and the groom usually opt for a photo shoot after their engagement and before their wedding. Nowadays, couples are viewing the pre-wedding photography to be as important as their wedding photography.

Hiring a photographer

The major step in getting a pre-wedding photo shoot done is to hire the right photographer. Now there are many photographers that one can hire, but it is best to choose the one with whom a couple can share a good rapport and be friendly. Unlike wedding photography, pre-wedding photography will be more relaxed, more fun and there will be more freedom as far as the poses and clothes are concerned, so the photographer also should be fun to deal with.

Opt for a photographer who has years of experience and the one you can afford. Do not go for a photographer who charges too much or too less. It is better to discuss how many photographs will be taken, in which format you will be getting it, whether you want an album, etc. before the photo session is agreed upon by both parties.

Deciding the location

It is up to you for choosing a picturesque location for getting your photos taken. At times couples may ask the photographer they hired for suggesting a good location that is not very crowded, is an illuminated area and an ideal choice for photography. You may choose a resort, a garden or a park, some area of historical significance, your home, or any other location.

Ideas

If you are confused and do not have any unique ideas for posing, you may count on your photographer. Photographers have a great eye for the right background, mix of colors, lighting, and other details. They can capture a couple in the best of poses; if you have no experience in posing, blindly follow what your photographer asks you to do, and the outcome will be great pictures.

Photographers can also suggest you props like masks, umbrellas, books, balloons, flowers, etc. to make your photos stand out.

If you can hire a good photographer, half the job is done. You just need to make the most of the time available and capture some great moments of togetherness before wedding. You may use these pictures for creating a customized wedding card or can also splash the photos all over the wedding hall as part of the wedding décor.

The Wedding Ring in Christian Marriages

The wedding ring symbolizes eternal love for Christians. The perfect circle of the wedding ring is deemed to be a circle of love and as a circle does not have any end, so this ring is thought to be the perfect epitome of immortal love, commitment and marital bond.

The make

For Christians, gold is usually the metal chosen for the making of the ring. The wedding ring is traditionally a simple plain band, but there are also rings with designs and engravings.

The finger

The wedding ring is normally worn on the ring finger or fourth finger of the left hand; the reason behind this is that the left finger is not as much used as the right hand for most people and the fourth finger is the second least used finger following the little finger, so wearing the ring on this finger would mean the soft metal (gold) will not face injury. The ring is not worn on the least used (little) finger, because then the ring would have very little surface area to be decorated.

Though there are superstitious beliefs saying that a vein of only the ring finger reaches the heart that is why the wedding ring is worn on that finger. The truth is that all fingers have veins that go right to the heart. It must also be noted that there are some exceptions where the wedding ring is worn on other fingers and not on the fourth finger.

The essence of a Christian wedding is never complete without a ring for many. More than 20 tonnes of gold (white and yellow) is used for the making of wedding rings every year in the United States alone.

Significance of Gotra in Hindu Marriages

Gotra/Gothra/Gotram is a concept that helps identify the families of a particular Hindu caste. This patrilineal classification is the base on which Hindu weddings usually occur. Brides and grooms belonging to a similar gotra are considered to be distantly related/brothers and sisters, and are forbidden from marrying each other.

The Gotra system originated among the Hindu Brahmins and is considered to be descents from Saptarishi or the seven sages, who were Angirasa, Atri, Gautam, Kashyapa, Bhrigu, Vasistha, and Bharadwaja.

Marriage between cousins can lead to deformed children; gotram can be a safe option

There is scientific evidence that marriage between blood relatives have chances of giving birth to abnormal offspring owing to hybrid DNA combinations and genetic mismatch. For maintaining the genetic distance in marriages, gotra is considered to be a safe bet. That is one of the major reasons why gotram has become such an important part of Hindu marriage traditions.

According to Hindu customs and vedic rituals, a marriage that takes place between a bride and a groom belonging to the same gotra is considered to be an impure union. It is believed that such a matrimony will bring upon doom on the family and clan; whereas, it is believed that marriage of people belonging to different gotras will bring happiness, progeny and prosperity to the family.

In a Hindu wedding, a bride belongs to her father’s gotra till the marriage is successful; post marriage she will belong to her husband’s gotra.

However, according to the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955, marriage between members of the same gotra has been legalized. ‘A marriage solemnized between Hindus before the commencement of this Act, which is otherwise valid, shall not be deemed to be invalid or ever to have been invalid by reason only of the fact that the parties thereto belonged to the same gotra or pravara or belonged to different religions, castes or sub- divisions of the same caste.’